Valentines

We had a nice dusting of snow last night, perhaps two or three inches, with bright clear skies this morning--so with the boys and the staff digging out the pathways, we should have a nice toasty, snowy Valentines tonight.

On this Valentines Day, I would like to land as hard as possible, with both feet, for the hundredth time, on the romantic myth, not because love's a bad thing, but because love has almost nothing to do with the insipid, superficial, idiotic way it is packaged by Hollywood low-lifes. Warning: there will be an ending give-away for NBC's "The Office" in this rant, so be aware.

As Office fans know, Jim and Pam are the producer's "normal" people, who look at life with the same balanced set of assumptions you might find in, say, a sound-stage production brat, fresh out of college, English lit major, between her ninety-third and ninety-fourth romantic-hormonal entanglement. If she has a faith life, this "normal audience member" is distinctly pluralistic in her approach, and if she worships anything, it's either art or progressive politics or the pursuit of "cool." Like Jim and Pam, she is largely reactive. She lives for someone else to do something stupid, or outlandish, so that she can roll her eyes. Not believing in anything, really, is her religion. Like the rest of us, she sees most of the Office characters as absurdly drawn comic extensions of contemporary work-a-day people. Dwight is the nerdy, vigilante, wannabe peace officer. (And agritourism farmer!) Angela is the tightly-coiled, cat-loving Christian hypocrite. Kevin is the pudgy adolescent with adult responsibilities and a flare for the obvious.

In a recent episode, Pam's parents are having marital problems, and this rocks Pam's sense of stability--as it would for most of us. Most baby boomers and Gen-Xers want to shop for love but they want their parents to be living in the same house forever. Pam's dad goes to Jim for advice and for some unknown reason, the relationship problem gets even worse. Pam is alarmed. What did Jim say? Well, it turns out Jim gave advice to Pam's Dad by reporting that he had never met anyone like Pam, someone who made him lose his balance when she walked into the room. Pam's Dad confessed that he never had that earth-shattering cosmic love tingle when Pam's mom walked into the room. Pam gets misty. She loves Jim. Jim loves her. Oh isn't it wonderful to be struck deaf, dumb and blind by love?

They don't want to work for love; they want love to smack them down onto the carpet and make them cry for mercy.

Well, of course this lost generation of the Runaway Brides needs to have that kind of experience. They have been receiving free birth control since seventh grade. They have been served up a dose of cynicism about middle-class, suburban values with literally every television show and movie they watch. They don't want to work for love; they want love to smack them down onto the carpet and make them cry for mercy, as though to say, from on high "this is the one, stupid!" Anything less would be sort of, well, Dwight Schrutish.

The Office production team is a good example of intelligent people who are keen social observers, witty writers, inventive comedians and, in the last analysis, utter fools.